Toilet Paper

A guy went to a grocery store and asked the clerk behind the counter for 2 cans of dog food.

"Do you have a dog?" asked the clerk.
"Yes, I do," replied the puzzled customer.
"I'm sorry, sir," the clerk replied, "but you'll have to prove to me that you have a dog before I can sell you the dog food."
The frustrated customer went home to get his dog and pulled it on its
leash all the way to the store.
"Here's my dog!" said the tired customer.
"Thank you, sir. Here are your 2 cans of dog food."
2 days later, the same guy returned to the same store. He went up to the same clerk and asked for 2 cans of cat food.

"Do you have a cat, sir?"
"Of course, I do!" said the exasperated customer.
"I'm sorry, sir, but I have to see your cat before I can sell you the cat food."
The guy stormed out of the store, went home, grabbed his cat, dragged it to the store and held the cat by its tail for the clerk to see.
"Thank you, sir. Here are your 2 cans of cat food."


The very next day, the guy returned to the store with a white shoebox with a small hole on

its cover. He approached the clerk and placed the shoe box on the counter.
"Yes, sir, " asked the clerk, "What can I do for you?" "Put your finger in the hole,"

ordered the guy.
"I beg your pardon?" asked the clerk.
"Just do as I said. It won't bite."
Cautiously the clerk put his finger in the hole.
"Pull your finger out and tell me what it looks like," said the guy. The clerk pulled out

his finger and exclaimed, "It looks like SH*T!"

"YOU ARE DAMN RIGHT! Now give me 2 rolls of toilet paper."